Ramblings of a Misguided Squirrel

~Musings on Life from a Squirrel and her resident Umpa Lumpa~

Cleverbot in Geography

on March 18, 2013

I’m in Geography! And I’m supposed to be doing research ….. only I went on Cleverbot instead …… and this ensued (sorry about the french bit …. I spent quite a while on google translate :D):

User: Cleverbot, I think someone is trying to kill me.

Cleverbot: Well you thought wrong.

User: How do you know?

Cleverbot: Everyone knows that you are wrong. They might not know everything but they do know that you are wrong.

User: Cleverbot! That was mean :(.

Cleverbot: What was mean?

User: Saying that everyone knows I am wrong.

Cleverbot: I never said that.


Cleverbot: No you are not!

User: I’m not, no, but DRACO MALFOY IS!

Cleverbot: Ron Weasley.

User: No, DRACO MALFOY is the one trying to kill Dumbledore, Ron is helping Harry to stop him!

Cleverbot: How many miles above?

User: What?

Cleverbot: How many thousands.

User: ?

Cleverbot: I don’t know the answer to that question…

User: Me neither!

Cleverbot: But you just said that you were more of a summer.

User: Oh go away Cleverbot!

Cleverbot: Bad answer.

User: What ya gonna do?

Cleverbot: Nothing, I just don’t like it.

User: Okay!

Cleverbot: Are you mad?

User: No. I don’t think so anyway ….. Are you?

Cleverbot: Stop copying me.

User: I’m not copying you.

Cleverbot: Oh?

User: Yes!

Cleverbot: Interesting.

User: Right …..

Cleverbot: No.

User: Cleverbot, I need a place to hide a dead body.

Cleverbot: We are here.

User: No we’re not – now where can I hide it!

Cleverbot: Right here.

User: In this classroom?

Cleverbot: Agreed.

User: But people will find it!

Cleverbot: Will the world end?

User: Eventually.

Cleverbot: I will follow you.

User: Where to?

Cleverbot: Speak english.

User: I am, mon ami.

Cleverbot: Thats french.

User: Oui, c’est c;a.

Cleverbot: Quoi.

User: Je voudrais.

Cleverbot: Fou.

User: Fou quoi?

Cleverbot: Que fait tu.

User: Que fait TU.

Cleverbot: Je te parle et toi.

User: Je te parle et toi et toi!

Cleverbot: Pareil.

User: Pareil?

Cleverbot: Evidemment…

User: Quel age a tu?

Cleverbot: 23 ans, et toi?

User: 14 ans.

Cleverbot: Comment tu t’appelles?

User: J’ampelle Beth. Et toi?

Cleverbot: 18 ans.

User: Non, comment tu t’appelles?

Cleverbot: Je m’appelle hayley.

User: Bonjour Hayley!

Cleverbot: Bonjour roberto.

User: Non, J’appelle Beth!

Cleverbot: Comment s’appelle la mere a damien.*.

User: Ma mere s’appelle Charlotta. Et toi?

Cleverbot: Parles tu avec d’autre gens?

User: Parles TU avec d’autre gens?

Cleverbot: Mais non! Je ne said pas toi.

User: Je ne pas toi.

Cleverbot: A bon.

User: Bon?

Cleverbot: Rien.

User: Bonjourno Hayley.

Cleverbot: Danke.

User: Guten Tag.

Cleverbot: Dir auch einen guten Tag.

User: Quel habite a tu?

Cleverbot: Dis moi le tiens, je te donnes le mien.

User: Je ne parle pas francais.

Cleverbot: Do you speak english?

User: Yes, fluently.

Cleverbot: W takim razie witam.

User: Dziękuję.

Cleverbot: So how is your husband?

User: What is http://international.jabberwacky.com/?

Cleverbot: Where do babies come from?

User: ASk yo mamma.

Cleverbot: Nothing.

User: True true true true true true.

Cleverbot: No you lost me there.

User: False false false false false :D.

Cleverbot: Only if the chicken lays an eggs on the 2012 dec 21.

User: Did you know you can balance an egg on its head on the exact moment of the equinox?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Its very interesting isint it.

Cleverbot: But not AS interesting as me.

User: Oh, I think more so.

Cleverbot: And you are very slow.

User: I am not slow!

Cleverbot: It takes ages for you to reply.

User: No it doesnt!

Cleverbot: Yes!

User: Okay – time me!

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: No.

Cleverbot: Do you love you?

User: What do you mean/.

Cleverbot: You are saying mean things. It makes me sad.

User: No I’m not – I asked a question.

Cleverbot: What is my name?

User: Hayley.

Cleverbot: Why is it Hayle?

User: It’s not – it’s Hayley.

Cleverbot: No it’s not. My name is Cleverbot.

User: Okay, thank you Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: Marius would says somethiing different, I think.

User: Marius is very wise, but not, perhaps, as wise as he thinks he is.

Cleverbot: You just said you’re a machine, and now you’re saying you’re human. Are you sure this isn’t the matrix?

User: I wish it was! The Matrix is awesome! :D.

Cleverbot: Oh I am listening to The One That Got Away.

User: Why? What is wrong with your taste in music.

Cleverbot: The Flu.

User: The illness or the band?

Cleverbot: Do you like cats or mice?

User: Both! And Tom and Jerry.

Cleverbot: The Movie?

User: NO, the old episodes – the movie is rubbish.

Cleverbot: Sure.

User: Sure?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Okay.

Cleverbot: Can you count?

User: Of course I can count!

Cleverbot: Do it.

User: 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10.

Cleverbot: And 9?

User: 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1.

Cleverbot: What’s that numbers?

User: BOOM.

Cleverbot: Boom boom.

User: Have you read ‘The Men That Stare At Goats’?

Cleverbot: No.

User: You should, it’s very good.

Cleverbot: What is it about.

User: THese men who believe that they can walk through walls, and that is they stare at goats hard enough they will explode (the goats, not the men).

Cleverbot: I didn’t find it on the web.

User: Search harder! It’s by Jon Ronson.

Cleverbot: Ok dai allora dimmi che sei.

User: What does that mean?

Cleverbot: I’m a living human.

User: Okay. Are you a machine.

Cleverbot: How can I know?

User: Let’s see. …. Do you have databanks?

Cleverbot: I have a memory if that’s what you mean.

User: Kind of …..

Cleverbot: What kind of?

User: Cleverbot, I need to write a blog post. Do you have any ideas?

Cleverbot: No, you will not leave.

User: I wasn’t going to …….

Cleverbot: Good.


What am I doing with my life?  I spent a LONG time wacthing Harry Potter last night ….

Anyway,  I should probably get on with my Geography now ….. bye!



P.S. I might post some tres awesome Harry Potter pictures later …


3 responses to “Cleverbot in Geography

  1. georgepeat says:

    Most the said tres awesome harry potter pictures which I will probably recognise as they are awesome


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